Have you ever longed for something so bad that you felt your heart would burst? I have. I’m 40.5 years old. I have never been to Disney World or have had children. The latter is more important to me. When I have a child I can take her there. I really want a girl. I have nothing against boys though.
We’ve been married 19 years now. The time has flown by. I have and will always long for children. I see other people so happy to have them. I know our lives would never be the same. We’ve enjoyed our time together as husband & wife. It’s been exciting to be so free. We have lost some of that freedom with our dog. He needs us. I think we can handle the bigger challenge of a child.
I’ve been collecting kid stuff for many, many years in hope of the day I have a child of my own. I’ve been looking at the items collected and the longing lingers. I want to feel that my heart will burst with the love I can lavish on my child. Please pray for us. There are always reasonings why and when it should happen. I don’t want it to never occur.
Our best bet is to adopt. With the bipolar I’m taking to many risky drugs that would hinder a healthy birth. We looked at adoption before. It sounds like they scrutinize the potential parents more than the birth parents. They will know everything, about the bipolar, skin and breast cancer. We need a miracle to get a child. I have to hold fast and truly believe that all things are possible with God!
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