I sit and stare at the walls feeling so alone. I have my dog, but he can’t fill the void in my heart with my hubbie gone. He will be back soon. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be single. I don’t want to know. I want my husband & I to live happily everafter. We’ll die in each others arms when were 88.
I can stand being alone temporarily. I just don’t like it. I sit with my thoughts dwelling on things that I don’t need to. I obssess over the stupidest stuff. My mind is a bank of uselessness sometimes. I don’t trust my emotions because they are fleeting. I pray that I get my thoughts under control, Gods. I want his mind, not mine.
Jesus was alone a lot. His closest friends abandoned him at the time he needed them most. He knows what I’m going through better than anyone else. I should learn from him that it’s okay to be alone sometimes. It’s just for a season.
My fave thing to do when Rob’s gone is blast some music, watch tons of movies he can’t stand and clean. Anything to keep my hands busy and, hopefully, my mind reasonably occupied. Make lunch dates with girlfriends too and cook meals that I know he wouldn’t eat. I still miss him but it helps if I plan lots of things that I like and he doesn’t, then it’s almost like I look forward to the alone time. Almost.